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Sometimes Going Against Your Family’s Will Is The Highway To Happiness

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.  Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” – Steve Jobs

family

Whenever we make a decision that will have a huge impact on our lives and that will possibly make us the happiest we’ve ever been, we share it with our family and close friends in the hope of having some sort of support. However, we don’t always get the words of encouragement we expect and that can be one of the biggest setbacks to ever encounter. If you are still uncertain of your decision, chances are, your friends and family will manage to dissuade you from pursuing your goal.

I will share a bit of my story with you: I was still living with my parents and had never left home when I decided I wanted to study abroad as part of an exchange program with my University. On the application, we had to pick three destinations in order of preferences. My first choice was Australia, second was London and third the USA. I had made it through the first round of selection to attend the University of Melbourne (Australia). When I told my mother about it, she flipped out : “Why do you wanna go abroad? and why so far away? (I was living in France at the time) why are you so extreme in your decisions? If you wanna leave home just find an apartment, you don’t have to go abroad! What if something happened to you? It’s too far and we can’t come to your rescue! If you absolutely want to speak English, stay at least in Europe, go to the UK!” Needless to say, she scared the crap out of me (excuse my language): I went to London instead of Australia.

When I decided to go to Canada, my mom knew there was nothing she could say to stop me at this point and although she was scared because Canada is far from France, I was determined to travel the world.
But another family member took her place. This person was very close to her own mother and would not go forward in life because of the guilt she felt whenever she left her mother; So, of course, she advised me not to go to Canada because it was too far from my mom, arguing my mother would be sad to have me so far away. I didn’t listen to her because I knew she was just echoing her own insecurities, her own fears and doubts on me. And I had learnt not to allow people’s opinion shut down my gut feeling.

And that is exactly what happens whenever someone tries to discourage you from doing anything. They are not intentionally trying to destroy your dream (not if they love you anyway). They truly believe they’re giving you the best advice by telling you not to go for it. They just don’t understand your goal. They often don’t have the courage to pursue their own aspirations, hence their reaction. Do not listen to them. Let them talk, but don’t be affected by anything they might say. They’re just voicing out their own fears, their own insecurities and doubts on you.

The people you love the most can be your biggest setback. Very few people have the courage to take action and do what is necessary to fulfill a dream. If you a re one them, keep going despise what the entire world has to say. No one knows what you are capable of accomplishing but you.

 

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